I will defend the $700 million carbonated water • toptecheasy.com

The crazy season is over in venture capital country.

Today investors and founders alike will bore your ears with notes about: incremental cash flow positivity and their timeline to adjusted EBITDA profitability.

Poor.

Despite the general dullness of the current venture capital landscape, filled with conservative valuations, falling deal sizes and cackling investors sitting atop a mountain of capital, we learned today that at least some people are having fun.

Enter Liquid Death, a direct-to-consumer water company that just raised a $70 million round at a $700 million valuation, according to Bloomberg reporting. The transaction makes Liquid Death 70% of a unicorn, which is pretty damn impressive considering the state of most DTC companies – see here – that we can track on the public market exchanges.

Why the huge price tag? Because water is a grow business, baby! Bloomberg’s Katie Dak — a former TechCruncher — writes that the company is “on track for $130 million in revenue this year,” up from $45 million in revenue last year. That’s the kind of growth investors are looking for.

Liquid Death has a few things that make the deal somewhat fair from my perspective. Sure, it’s easy to dip into a $700 million water startup when there are cheaper alternatives; other brands of carbonated water, making your own bubbles, or just drinking tap water like a farmer are all options.